have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
