His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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