HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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