Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
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