If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
