piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
