well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
