please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
