Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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