Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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