Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
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