Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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