Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
