Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
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