at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize