Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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