You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
