Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
