I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize