We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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