last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
