A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
