Im at strip club and am horny
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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