Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
