I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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