it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
