we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
