She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
