Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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