sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
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