just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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