She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
