Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
