Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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