what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
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