how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
