The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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