she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
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