oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
i was born a porn star she said
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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