just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
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I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
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I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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