OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I am one with the molecules
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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