I'm really into asian looking animals
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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