She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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