i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
