watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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