So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
where are my eyebrows?
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