Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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