But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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