You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
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