I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
