I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
he shaved USA in his pubs
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
