Texts From Last Night

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  (252): View more from North Carolina

  just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting

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  (252): just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting http://tfl.nu/rg7x
  Replies (3) Good night (530) Bad night (698) Order T-Shirt
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?

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  (313): So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life? http://tfl.nu/8qm6
  Replies (37) Good night (4859) Bad night (1131)
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.

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  (262): Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face. http://tfl.nu/let7
  Replies (4) Good night (612) Bad night (3321) Order T-Shirt
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day

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  (703): i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day http://tfl.nu/h495
  Replies (29) Good night (6470) Bad night (525) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.

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  (412): Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building. http://tfl.nu/dxj2
  Replies (17) Good night (5366) Bad night (815) Order T-Shirt
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis

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  (267): I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis http://tfl.nu/zmb9
  Replies (21) Good night (983) Bad night (3451) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics

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  (917): Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics http://tfl.nu/t7mh
  Replies (7) Good night (2776) Bad night (1373) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.

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  (612): drunk taco night MLK would want it this way. http://tfl.nu/ye78
  Replies (9) Good night (2606) Bad night (730) Order T-Shirt
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.

  (1-316): View more from Kansas

  That's how you know you deserve to be a senior

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  (316): I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES. (1-316): That's how you know you deserve to be a senior http://tfl.nu/bxif
  Replies (13) Good night (4518) Bad night (690) Order T-Shirt
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment

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  (201): There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment http://tfl.nu/jnnd
  Replies (2) Good night (529) Bad night (1335) Order T-Shirt
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..

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  (910): I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks.. http://tfl.nu/st44
  Replies (7) Good night (1719) Bad night (636)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.

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  (717): If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate. http://tfl.nu/gd7q
  Replies (13) Good night (2357) Bad night (532) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.

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  (443): My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love. http://tfl.nu/12sb
  Replies (8) Good night (3455) Bad night (473)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience

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  (703): Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience http://tfl.nu/mhgr
  Replies (5) Good night (1231) Bad night (430) Order T-Shirt
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.

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  (403): Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards. http://tfl.nu/sqj0
  Replies (3) Good night (843) Bad night (433)

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